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SQL Humor: 10 Best things about being a DBA

dbDigger, SQL Humor

SQL Humor: 10 Best things about being a DBA

  1. Being able to say no to developers, however much they whine.
  2. Being able to over-spec new hardware (with an unlimited budget!).
  3. Decorating the office with SQL Server System Table maps.
  4. Saying “Ah no, I can’t do that, it’s a security issue”, when what you really mean is, right now, you just can’t be bothered.
  5. Having a support relationship with someone at Microsoft.
  6. Opening the quarterly MSDN disk pack updates, and having control over which ones the developers can get their hands on (usually the disks with the software names ending in MUI (Multilingual User Interface) or just giving them a foreign language version of SourceSafe knowing they can’t do anything with it but will be excited at being given a DVD anyway).
  7. Management take you ever-so-slightly-more-seriously than when you used to be a developer.
  8. Having a lockable desk drawer, citing such a requirement on the grounds of security to lock up passwords and disks (or rather, that jumbo bag of chips you’ll only get out when those ever-hungry developers have all gone home).
  9. Having an electronic swipe card that opens the server room door (how important am I?).
  10. Knowing that Dilbert doesn’t apply to you!
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